This week, I had a friend and her newborn daughter over for lunch. As I was cuddling the sweet little girl, my friend asked me, “How are you going to do all this with two of them?”
I guess I hadn’t really thought about it yet. And now it’s kinda all I can think about.
My plan for the first few weeks is to simply survive. Sleep as much as possible. (HAHAHAHA like I’ll get any sleep.) Try to pay attention to both kiddos in semi-equal amounts. Do laundry occasionally. Eat a lot of sandwiches and take out. That part I’m actually not too worried about. In the beginning, I have no expectations of myself besides keeping both of the kids alive. My husband will be home for around 2 weeks for paternity leave, and that will help immensely.
It’s when I have to go back to actually being productive that has me nervous. How long will it take us to settle into some semblance of a routine? I wish I could remember how long that took with Vicki, but, honestly, the beginning was such a fog that I don’t know. And while I am aware there will be good days and bad days, there are times where I already feel overwhelmed and I still have 4 months until my due date. (Cue panic attack that I have *only* 4 months until my due date.)
Strangely enough, I don’t feel bad about taking time away from Vicki when we have VonBoy. We have always planned to have multiple kids, so I think of the time Vicki was our only child as kind of a bonus for her. She’s very good around babies and loves to play with her baby dolls and point of pictures of babies, so hopefully we have minimal issues with the transition. I think she’ll be more of a “Mommy’s Helper” than a “Jealous Sibling”.
As I get bigger, I can’t move around as easily or play with her how I normally would. Today is the first day I really feel pregnant – big, awkward, unwieldy – and I felt bad about not being able to get down on the floor with her to play. I find myself preferring to sit on the couch and have Vicki bring toys over to me because it’s more comfortable and easier to get up from the couch. I get a little winded when I carry her up stairs. I know it’s only going to get more difficult. I’m crossing my fingers that spring gets here soon (as we have 10″ of snow outside) and we can go play outside and let her burn off her energy.
On a completely selfish note, we just got to the point where she has a reliable napping and sleeping schedule and I enjoy having a few hours in the afternoon and evenings to write, read, and do projects. I’m not looking forward to the complete lack of me-time and being back in a zombie state. Then I feel awful for even thinking that because I am so grateful and excited for VonBoy and I should just be all happy-puppy-rainbows over here. Which I am, 90% of the time. And the other 10% I think, “Oh, man, I really love sleep, giving it up again is going to blow.”
On the plus side, after I give birth, I can drink real coffee again. And beer. So that should help.
People with more than one kid – how rough is the transition? Is going from one to two more difficult than going from zero to one? Am I crazy for still thinking we want to have four kids when all is said and done?